Some twenty-five years ago or so, I met a man. Nothing particular about that. Most women meet at least one man in her life, and the story that follows can be good or bad – or a mix of both. I guess mostly a mix of both. 😉
When I suddenly started to think of this man today, it wasn’t in a bad way. I’ve no memories of harsh speaking, no events that made me cry or suffer in any way. He was a bit odd, but basically he was kind and honest.
What impressed me a lot when I the first time visited his place, was that he owned quite a lot of books. Since I’m a dedicated reader myself, this was a very positive sign. One of the books was “A course in Miracles”.
He simply said it was a spiritual book that he used to read. I just held the dark blue book in my hands for a while, opened it and saw the thin paper sheets, and the small font the words were printed in – and then we returned to the table, the cheese, the crackers and the wine. And the talking.
Later on I moved in with him, and saw him sitting there with the book and a huge english dictionary. It must have been hard for him, since he very often had to check what the words meant. First translation of the specific words into our language, and then also to understand the meaning of the text.
For some time he nevertheless persisted with the reading, but then he started to meditate in the mornings instead. Until he one morning happened to fall asleep, and almost missed go to work in time. After that he started doing Qigong instead. I never saw him open the Course again.
During that period one of my daughters lived across the street, and sometimes she saw a glimpse of him early mornings while he was doing his stretchings and breathings and rolling-the balls and whatever those movements are called. His figure was quite boney, and with long legged a bit saggy drawers, and an equally saggy sweater in the same color, he looked rather laughable.
I think the outfit was red…
I can’t recall if we ever talked about spiritual things, nor doing anything concerning spirituality together. I don’t know why, since I earlier had been interested in both this and that when it came to spirituality. It must have been at least ten years earlier when the first time I read Shirley MacLaines books “Out on a limb” (et cetera), a number of Deepak Chopras books, and also others. I knew people and did various thing to enhance my knowledge of these matters.
Now when I came to think of this, it makes me curious. Why didn’t we talk about, and encouraged each other in this area? Why didn’t we DO anything together?
The answer might be, that he was also very materialistic and the Course, the Meditation and the Qi gong was merely some kind of fads. Maybe he was doing these things more for the physical well-being of it, not for spiritual purposes.
I would really like to know! If he said something then about “why”, I have forgotten it. And what did this behavior do to me? Hopefully I’ll get som answers along the road, while Walking the walk.
Nevertheless! For one birthday, not long before we moved apart, he gave me a copy of “A course in Miracles”.
I have still not read it.
I’ve tried a couple of times. But it’s hard.
I’ve encountered it in different ways, f.ex. on youtube, in other books, spiritual people who talk about the Course and how much it means to them.
Recently I found the Podcasts.
Just listen to someone who reads it straight on, (with a dull voice) is worse than reading it myself. And I don’t like to listen to one of those podcasts that seems to be like on radio, people who talk in the mouths of each other, and are like “we know it all”!
Then I found Cynthia Morgan with “A Course in What?!”
Wonderful! (You can find it on iTunes)
She reads a paragraph or two and then discusses the meaning of it! It’s understandable! It’s possible to learn from it! And the fact that I miss much of it, lose the concentration to listen, don’t understand what it means, that doesn’t matter.
It’s a start for me – at last – and some of it goes into my mind, and some of it hooks me up and I’ve already found seeds that have helped me in some way or made me remember something. I’ve got a couple of AHA-moments!
And that’s a good start.