Linguistic ponderings

Since English isn’t my native language, I have some issues around that. I don’t write as fast as I do in my own language which, by the way, is Swedish.

When writing in my own language, I’m really good. Maybe even excellent. I have a huge vocabulary, know grammar really well, and have the ability to use the language and make it into whatever I want.

It’s not just about technique, knowing grammar and having a huge vocabulary, that makes a text good. And it doesn’t matter what you’re writing. A novel, a short story, an essay, an article – or whatever else.

It’s the feeling for the language and the topic that matters. Knowing how to use the tools and the rules and even change them, if necessary. It’s about using the words, and the layout, to make them reflect what’s in the text.

It’s about showing, not telling. It’s about letting the readers live inside the text, to be with it and feel it just as if they are there themselves! Not just reading it plain and square.

I can do that! Not in the first draft of course. Writing well is not about getting your baby perfect immediately. It’s about working with the text, over and over again, like as if it was a lump of clay you’re modeling, or a canvas turning into a grandiose painting.

Yes! I paint with words!

Or – at least I did.
Until the CFS burnt me into silence.

That is, I’m still skilled! I have still the tools. I’m still experienced, schooled and knowledgeable. I know how to do this!

I have now regained most of my concentration ability, a couple of years ago that ability was next to nil. But I’ve still not regained my fantasy. I don’t know what to write! Where are those ideas that earlier always came to me? And don’t give me any clever advice here, I know them all!

Yet! I feel I’m on my way! For example, when taking tours on my bike, my mind keeps on “writing”, Those writings just don’t get transferred to the computer!
A funny thing though, my mind is mostly writing in English!

So! I’m obviously not as good in English as in Swedish. Nothing odd about that. I’ll probably never will be! But… that, of course, depends on whom I’m compared with…  and I’m getting better and better!

Nowadays I always watch English and American movies without Swede subs. I started doing that about nine to ten years ago.
Almost all the books I read nowadays, I read in English. More and more during these last 5-6 years, ever since I really discovered iBooks. Oh gosh! I love that app.

Then there is YouTube. Which is not only filled with music. There are loads of documentaries. There are audio-books. And all those seminars and teachings in the spiritual realm, I’ve discovered. Wayne Dyer, Louise Hay, all channelings like Kryon, Abraham-Hicks. Even movies! The Secret!
What would I have done, if I hadn’t been able to understand spoken English! I’d been outside of a whole realm!

So why do I seem to be complaining over writing or not writing in English?

I’ll tell you!
It takes such a long time to do it! Way longer then writing in Swedish.

Nerdy as I am, when it comes to writing and language-handling, I would love to write as perfect as possible! And I realize I don’t. I have some ISSUES! For example, I have a hard time with prepositions. Some of them are as glued together with the main word. Some are just… NOT glued together! And I keep guessing since I know no rules for this. Where is the logic? What…???  of?… at?… by?…???

I struggle with checking the dictionary for synonyms, the right preposition, or maybe for a word in english I don’t already know! Just to get the text, just as I want it to be! Just as I can make it be, when I write in Swedish!

I began to learn English at school, and I must have been like twelve or thirteen at that time. And school is school! You just have to learn grammar and spelling as well as a decent vocabulary. Nowadays kids begin to learn English at a much younger age. And mostly they at that time already know some – thanks to the internet and all technical devices.

Years after that, not much happened! Not until Internet. Blogging. Books…

Since then my vocabulary has increased immensely. But I can’t spell as good as I used to since I now mostly learn by listening! Thus I don’t always see the word for my inner eye, as I do the words I learned by reading and writing. There are also not only “perfect” English! There are slang words and different dialects. The patterns of spoken language are so distinct from those of writing. There are these personal differences… and so on…

And it’s fun! It’s fun to learn new expressions! Y’all… And I like it so much!

So sometimes it can be hard to find out how to spell a word… and maybe, maybe I don’t use it the best way. But I keep on learning! I want to learn more.

Meantime, though, I keep on checking my writings in dictionaries. Looking for words, synonyms.
Is it “chose” or “choose” here? I always mix up those words with each other. As I do with “lose” and “loose”, and… well… others…
Is the word (XXX) correct to use in this meaning? Does it say what I want it to say?
What synonym can I use here?
And so on…

No wonder it takes me so long to write a post. Often hours… and hours…

For some time now, I have used 1Checker as a helper. It’s hm… so so… helps a bit, but I know English enough to see it often gives very ludicrous solutions. I don’t’ trust it fully!

Earlier today I downloaded Grammarly, there is a free release now as well as a paid one. And it seems to be very good! And it’s so much easier to use… it kind of makes it even funnier to write! I so much want to see what it says about my writings! And so far, before checking this particular post, my rankings lies between 94 and 98! I’m so pleased. (Though those previous texts are fairly short ones.)

(Now I’ll run the first check (and make the changes)

This post, up to this point, wasn’t that good. Mostly I had made mistakes by carelessness. Like missing one letter in a word, writing “dont'” instead of “don’t”, and such mistakes.
I would, without doubt, have found those mistakes all by myself while editing. I always edit my texts. That’s another reason why writing takes me so long. But I find that necessary if I want to be pleased with what I’ve written. I do that in Swedish texts as well. Gosh, what a writer I am!

As I said – this is so fun! And if I write directly into Grammarly, I see the mistakes almost at the same time as I make them!
I little bit disturbing, I must say. Better write first, then edit, and then let Grammarly check it all. Better ranking then…

And finally – I decide what to keep and what has to go, or to be changed.



Reblogged this on Thoughts & Ponderings and commented:

New on my other blog… 😀


I wouldn’t have guessed English isn’t your first language. I think you write very, very well in English…better than many native speakers I’ve come across.


    Thank you! I really appreciate your feedback! 😀 I try hard to write as well as possible.
    And, yes, I too notice once in a while very bad writing, even from people who should know better.

    Liked by 1 person

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