Earlier today I tried to write an ordinary blog post. Nothing happened. My mind had slammed the writing door shut.
For a while, I pondered whether to write about the burnout or not. But naah. Why indulge in negative issues? There are better ones to put energy in. But I can tell you this, just shortly.
– From been living in constant fatigue, not being able to write, read nor even listen to music; to now once again being able both to read and listen to music (if I chose to) AND – since only a short while ago – I WRITE AGAIN!!!!
You can’t believe, how much I have longed for that, so now I live in awe, and are soooo grateful for all the pep talk I’ve got from you wonderful people here on WP!!! Getting likes, and reading your comments, have really helped me get going with the words again. And even in a better style, than before the burnout, I think. I was also a little bit afraid when writing in another language than my own, that I wouldn’t find my own voice again. But, actually, I think I have! It all seems to Be Goooood!
And of course! The Writing-prompts, Ninny Rhino and CampWriMo have been a huge help on the way!
I’m not on the safe side yet, though. Meaning having the routine of writing daily; and easily, naturally just sit down to work without thinking much of it! Just doing it!
I now do a lot of pacing around (mentally mostly) before I finally manage to sit down in front of the Mac and begin writing. I still have to force myself to do it. Especially since I haven’t got a clue of what to write. But then! When only the first words are written, I usually enter the flow.
Except for yesterday.
The day before yesterday, I had written a long text that was meant to be the continuing on “Andrew Millbourne’s big secret”. It turned out to be crap. It was supposed to deal with why the people at that planet have all these metal implants. Why, how and from when.
I ended up with a text where the first circa 350 words is quite good, but the remaining 700-something words, is nothing but a tiring, boring, wordy, telling, verbiage, blä-blä… blä-blä…
In a way, not bad. I can certainly use the information as a background for myself while writing. Getting to know one’s characters, you know. But letting a reader actually read this!!! Oh no! No! No! NO!
Then yesterday, I thought I could use those 700-something words after all. BUT! Edit the text hard! Use what is usable, and make it into a dialogue. So I copied the text and pasted it to a new document. Dated it May 5th.
Oh my god!!! It was good thinking, but a disaster to work with. So hard! Seemed impossible to get some word at all, onto the document. Not until I only used the first sentence and deleted all the rests, I finally managed to write a text where Andrew and one of the spokesmen are talking together, and Andrew asks about those implants, its origin and usage.
And he realizes a lot more, what he hadn’t been informed about beforehand. Kind of Surpriiiiise!!!!
That text is not finished yet, though. Not to my own surprise – my writing-time are evenings. Just about from now (8PM), as a matter of fact, and for a couple of hours onward.