creativity

Future

There was a time, when I took a lot of photos,
then edited them, into either this or that.
Now when I see them, I begin to wonder
Where did that time go? How did I come to this?

There was also a time, when I wrote poems
I don’t seem to do that either, any more
Or?


the future is now
when you’re laying you’re puzzle
chunks, bits and pieces
in the choice of your own.

so don’t even think
of gluing them together
in a malicious pattern
you don’t even adore

an old poem of mine

 

Panicking!

Not that long ago, I wrote a short story. (Haven’t we all…) Well! This particular one has come to my mind several times lately. It would probably do very well as a kind of Post Scriptum, or epilogue, to my “Eclipse”-story. It’s not particularly long, only 719 words –
But written in Swedish..
So I’ll have to translate it…

Okay! Let’s do it! I thought and tried to find it among my other short stories.

Couldn’t find it!!  – iiiooooiiiiiooooooiiiii – panic PANIC!!!!

Where is it???
I searched everywhere. I couldn’t remember the title I had given it, you see. So I searched for pages-documents, pdf-documents, scrivener-documents…The only thing I was sure of – it couldn’t be written in a word-document.

PANIC PANIC!!!

Then it hit me! The external hard drives! I have several, and among those, there are two quite big ones. The first one, a 2 TB (Terabytes), mostly movies, but it has also a folder with images/photos. Didn’t check that folder out, though. Wonder how many images/photos I can find there, and how old they are?
I thought it also should have been a folder with my writings there – but no. I’m sure it has been, though not any longer.
The other one then! The one with room for the Time machine! Oh, you who have a Mac must know what I mean by that. It’s for BACK-UPS!!!! (Which I don’t do often enough)

Okay! In there it is room for 3 TB, so I thought there would be more than just the backups! There wasn’t, but okay okay! Back-ups are good!!!
Two main folders. One from the iMac I don’t have any longer, and in there was nothing available. It wasn’t possible to open “Documents” and there was no “User”. Doesn’t matter – could very well delete the iMac folder anyway.

The MacBook folder then? OH yes! Oh yes! There were folders alright!!! But in which one was the biggest chance to find the file I was looking for? When did I write this in the first place? Probably in 2015. Remember the circumstances and where I was at that time.

Nothing in the first folder I opened – too new. Nothing in the second – too old. But in the third, or if it was the forth, THERE IT WAS!!!!

Oh my god oh my god THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!

It is a good one, you see, this story. And it would so much fit in to “The Solar Eclipse”, and why on earth have I deleted it sometime? Must have been a mistake!

I also found other short stories that I had missed and wondered about. Where are they! And why have they been missing? What did I do when I did it???

I just say this, and I’ll only say it once (at least for now):
MAKE SURE YOU DO BACKUPS ON YOUR IMPORTANT STUFF!!
And preferably to more than one place.

So, now I’m working on translating this short story, and you surely know by now what I think about that kind of job. (I hate dislike it very much)

But it is as it is! All for the good of writing!

Also today, my friends!

Today, I didn’t reach 1000 words, but close enough! 967 of them. It’s okay! Though I didn’t think it was a particular good scene. And not until circa 500 words along the path, it started to feel like a flow again.

Though everything doesn’t have to be tip-top at the first draft. It seldom is anyway – or more or less. Some texts are good almost immediately.

Yesterday I wrote 1165 words. Thought the whole thing was lousy. But when I read that scene today, it wasn’t that bad after all. Need of course some editing, deleting unnecessary words, and so on. Can do! But not know.

Todays? Well, the second half is okay – and can be of good use as well as yesterday’s “failure”.

On the whole – I’m still satisfied, pleased and happy. And eager to continue writing tomorrow. Have nothing booked for tomorrow – other that I really should clean up a bit here.

It’s almost silly

Ninny Rhino – the Mini WriMo – day 26

I’m still organizing those files, between the “must do’s”. Not much left now. Only the worst ones are still waiting for me to take care of them. The novels with the most files and folders are lying there grinning at me.

I dread starting to go through that massive slave-work.

Also, all of my files with saved blog posts are left. Couldn’t upload them to Scrivener. Probably due to all images. At that time, I just copied the posts as they were and pasted them into word documents.

So I’ll have to:
1). Throw away all copies!
2). Delete all images.
3). Turn all the posts into chronological orders.

Must be at least 1000-1500 posts in those files, if that’s enough, and not counting the copies. And then all the copies of the files… and copies of copies…

But I let my old health-and-food-blog go down the drain!

Goodness, gracious! How much I must have written during those years between 2006 and 2012! … or something.
(There are a few texts of later dates.)

It was fun checking out my work, though. Found myself reading here and reading there. Found idéas, notes, short drafts et cetera, which I had almost forgotten about.

Besides “The Solar Eclipse”, I have other Fantasy drafts, and after mixing some of those shorter texts (idéas, notes) with already existing drafts, I might have some kind of openings for at least two novels. Maybe three.
(Maybe more? My first novel started with a sentence I overheard one day. A sentence with three words only… and a “triptych” I wrote – three short stories that go together – began with a surname I once saw in an elevator…)

Do I have material for these? And imagination and inspiration enough to continue writing? Well! Let’s see! I’ve better go inside and ask my Muse.

“Do you think…
“Yes!” she immediately interrupts me. (Or if it is a he… or an androgyne… or my guardian angel… or my higher self… whoever…)

Apropos! I also found a short story I wrote fairly recently, in 2015 I think, with a Muse as the main character. It’s a funny story. A funny Muse. A male Muse. My Muse. (Okay! So it is a he, after all.)

There is, without doubt, more work to do with all these files, but I sense I ‘d rather want to start writing again now! Can continue sorting intermittently. There’s just one big question – which of those drafts, beginnings, whatever, should I focus on first? Or is perhaps the newest one, The solar eclipse, the one I now foremost need – actually need –  to keep on wakening me up from the not-writing-fiction-coma?

I must confess, though!

I’m scared.
Happy! Thrilled! But also scared.
It lures me – to start writing again, properly, after so many years with and after the burn-out.
But it also frightens me immensely. Especially if I chose to continue working on The Solar Eclipse
And feel that I should share some results with you. Like a continuing story…

What if I fail???
What if I drop out???

Or is sharing with you, just what I need?
A little pressure to achieve… at least something?

Hardworking

Ninny Rhino – the Mini WriMo – day 22

A while ago, I told you I was organizing my files and folders with writing stuff. (That was two weeks ago. How time flies when you’re happy). My first goal was to gather my writings in one folder only, in one place at the computer. At the same time, I wanted to get rid of as many copies as possible. Most of the files were word documents, .doc and .docx, but there were also .txt, .rtf, Pages, old Scrivener files and some pdf. The oldest ones from 2006. (I believe.)
(Where are all those prior of 2006?)

I gathered them together and also deleted lots! After a couple of days, each of my novels was to be found in its own folder, no matter how many files it still consisted of. Some of my short stories also got a folder of its own, while the other had to share. Like my mini short-stories. But also shared main folders for diary-notes, short drafts and idéas, old blog posts, notes from all my lessons in Creative writing, et cetera!

Still, though, there were lots of copies, and copies of copies. But I couldn’t, without first checking it, delete a file called “Chapter one” for example. Not until I knew where it belonged. Wouldn’t take the risk of deleting a whole manuscript by “mistake”! (Read carelessness)

It felt really good to see, that one and only head-folder on the desktop and inside neatly presented every main folder I had created. And nowhere else on the computer, there were files that instead should be in there.

I paused, for like a week. Pondered how to continue. Those word documents are horrible to compare with each other. Is it an exact copy of a file, or is it actually a different version? Would I really have to open all those files,  just to be able to compare?

No! There was a much better solution. When I wrote “The Solar Eclipse” I did it in Scrivener. And there it was! Of course, I should upload all my files to Scrivener as different projects!

I uploaded one folder at a time. Started with “Idéas, notes and short drafts”. It was perfect! I got a perfect view of all the files, could see two of them at the same time and easily switch to another, and also easily delete duplicates. Then sort the files in different folders, depending on what type of note it was.

For a couple of days, I now have occupied myself with this task, and I actually enjoy doing it! I’m not finished yet. Done are the eight easiest folders, but I still have to maintain the novels and the longer short stories. And some other stuff!

Well… thirteen folders left, actually, and only three or four of them I would consider “easy”. Thanks to Scrivener, it will still take hours and hours to finish this quest. But! It will be manageable! (I’ve dreaded this slave-work for years…)

Thank Goodess, I have a 27 inches external screen! With my MacBookPro’s 13 inches screen only…
Let’s just say this: it’s easier with a bigger screen. It doesn’t have to be that jammed…

The story begins

Ninny Rhino – the Mini WriMo – day 18

It was really wonderful, the other day, to sit here in my chair writing. It was thrilling to experience the story growing, hatching somewhere within me, and then pouring down through my fingers. I used Scrivener. The first story written in this recent upgrade of Scrivener, and a story never written before. All is new, one could say. A fitting start after all these years with a burn-out.

I called it “The Solar Eclipse”. Not a particularly fancy name, rather obvious actually, but also quite adequate. There is something peculiar about that eclipse, so it will be present in the story more than once.

My intention when I started to write, was to create a short text. After all, I haven’t written any new story, neither short nor long, for several years. I’ve been working on one of my novels now and then though, that really needed a freshen up, but that’s quite a different issue, isn’t it? And not even half as fun.

I had also a couple of thoughts about what the story would be like. A couple of why’s and a couple of how’s. What was driving the main character to do what she (or he?) had done and is about to do. What will happen along the road? It didn’t turn out as planned. Soon enough the story started to live a life of its own (as usual), and I just loved that (as usual)!

There are still some of those seeds and intents left there, but instead of just a really short Short story, it seems like it has the potential of being something more. And I actually long for continuing writing. If not for anything else, at least so I will know what happens next. And next…

I chose to write in the present tense since I like that form and it will do well considering the “I” is telling the story. Not exactly as a narrator, but the point of view will (probably) remain in the main characters head. I know this will call for some extra attention from my part, but this isn’t the first time I chose this form. Though, so far, only in short stories. However, a challenge like this might very well be really fun.

I’m so happy that stories still can come through me, and if it hadn’t been for Diana’s March speculative fiction prompt, I might not have written anything at all. Or at least it would have taken a lot more time before I managed to force myself even to try.

 

Monday evening – and Ninny Rhino

We have had terrible weather this weekend. Maybe I exaggerate a bit, but it has been some really fierce winds. Storm, when worst. Friday was at least sunny so the fact I had to go out on my bike, wasn’t that bad after all. Was lucky too, didn’t have the wind totally against me.

Saturday, on the contrary, offered not only storm gusts, but also rain. I stayed indoors the entire day.

I let the vacuum cleaner chase dust rats, I did the dishes – but mostly I was watching old episodes of Dr Who and doing solitaires on the iPad. Napping, of course. I do a lot of napping nowadays. Sunday, the weather had cleared up a bit, and I went for a short bike-ride. Only 8,3 kilometer. Bought bananas too…

I confess! I haven’t written a word since the last blog post! But I have continued to clean up among files and folders. It’s crazy how many copies, and copies of copies, there are on the hard drive. Still not finished that work, but slowly getting at least some order in the mess.

Today, I had an appointment with my physiotherapist before lunch, and late afternoon I paid a visit to the painting-study-group. At least I, could need a bit of proper “studying”.

On the other hand, I think painting is really fun to occupy myself with; but it is painting with words, that is my real vocation.

The colorful one

Despite the fact a 7-year-old can paint better than I, the colorful woman I did the last time, now has got a sister.
The “teacher” didn’t say much. Just asked if I had copied some image of a sort. “No”, I answered, and realized he had totally forgotten about my colorful other.

Then he left me, and I kept on struggling with painting lips.

The sister. A bit more… punky! Ey? I wonder why I painted those red thingies on both sides of her… ??? I mean – the thingies in her hair, are supposed to be there. But the other ones???

As I said – a 7-year-old could do this better, but…

I. Don’t. Care!!!

… a girl just got to have fun…

Apropos the Ninny Rhino! I’ve decided to extend my commitment for the entire March, not only 9 days. I know I haven’t actually written anything, but it makes me land in a writer-mood. I’ve began longing for writing something more than occasional blog posts.

There is this prompt for March month that Diana Wallace Peach at Myths of the Mirror has on her blog. And I’m really tempted to join in.

Sunday!

And I know you will be! You are!!!

To all of us! You and me and everyone else.